I'm Cold Hearted ...

... apparently.

Last week I was accused by two people of being cold-hearted: one knows me very well, the other hardly at all. I was told that I put up an emotional barrier, that I don't let people close to me.

And yet, on the other hand, I'm often accused of being too open! Especially on here!

It's weird!

But I guess that sometimes it is easier to let people get to know the person you want them to know and not the one under the mask. It's difficult when you've had bad experiences of people, to let others close to you. So new people are punished for the sins of the old. Which really isn't fair. But the more you're let down, the more difficult it is to trust.

I've also been told that I have an online persona - which I really wasn't aware of. I thought I was just me - but someone's seen through that!! And when I actually sit and think about it, well yes, I am different to the online me. The online me's gobbier and less sensitive. The real me's more capable of being hurt. Sometimes I guess I get confused as to the boundaries between the two - and that's when I'm in danger of pressing that self-destruct button.

Para xxx